Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Have you ever watched a drama series and followed the plot from one episode to another, hoping to find out the ending? What about after you have finally reached the ending you wished that the drama would never come to an end and that you can continue to watch it?
I guess that when a relationship ends, a lot of people have the same feeling as wehn they were watching their favorite soap opera. That is, when they have reached the end of it, they wish that there are a few more episodes before it truly is over, or they wish that the drama series have a second season, and a third season, and a fourth, and a fifth...
Once, a friend of mine said, "Losing doesn't mean the end. But giving up does." I am not sure if this makes sense to anyone, but it meant a lot to me. I believe this to be true because when I decided to give up on my previous relationshp, everything between us had come to an end. I have no regrets, no lingering love, just a feeling of tiredness and "oh, what a pity he is not the one for me" (no sarcasm intended).
Many pages of my diary have I dedicated to writing about my love for him, doubts of him, and complains about him. For almost 3 years, my life was all about him until I chose to walk away. Indeed, what meant so much to me before have now become so strange and so unbearable. It is strange how time can wash away memories, emotions, and even love. Would you stop loving someone because of the time that has past, as if everything between you had never occured before? As if everything is just a romantic drama series you enjoy fantasized yourself in?
Letting go means when the drama ends, there will be no hoping for a second season. It means that you can finally tell yourself to start watching another drama series. Letting go, which once meant forgetting, giving up, and ignoring your deepest feelings has now a new definition for me. It means to stop looking back to the past and stop digging through the old memories. Instead, look forward with an open mind and heart for another beautiful episode to begin...this time with a happy ending.